Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference. 
 
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

Being in a new city is both exciting and frightening. I have had a lot of time over the last two weeks to really continue to reflect on myself and my life in general. A lot of the times, these types of reflections are not always positive. I have realized some very new things. I am working hard to continue to make myself a better person but it is hard when you do not feel that constant support around you. My family has always been very important to me - however, as I move forward in this new journey, I am prepared to do it on my own.

Today at MTSU (Middle Tennessee State University for those who havent figured it out), we starting working on Streghts Quest. Two of my themes are connectedness and responsibility. These both speak so much to who I am and becoming.  For so long, I have spent so much time thinking about how everything I do impacts my family. However, I fail to realize how much I have allowed them to effect me. For the longest time, my friends have been telling that it is not my job to hold everything together. So why has it taken so long for me to realize this on my own? When am I going to stop worrying about how Brittany/Amber/Dad will feel about my decisions and start doing it for me?

Another realization I made this morning (AND IT WAS SCARY) was that I am already missing that excitement that comes with working. Shouldn't I want to wake up each day and be excited to go to work? I mean - IT IS ONLY DAY 2 OF MY NEW JOB?! It is scary to think I may be over Residence Life at age 25. I have dedicated so much time, 6 YEARS, to do this and make it my career. It was irronic that today we talked about finding the positive in a bad day at work. I need to give it time. Maybe I am going through separation feelings - I mean, I don't know anyone here, I don't have internet in my apartment, and my cell service sucks down there (in the apartment). I am alone majority of the time. 

I will make it - I have to make it. I am going to keep trucking along and give Murfeesboro a chance. I am sure it will be a wonderful experience for me.